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Questions & Answers
Q: Why do I perform wedding ceremonies?
A: Based on our own experience, we realize the frustration that those without a religious connection may have when trying to find a Celebrant who will work closely with them to develop a meaningful ceremony, without inappropriate religious statements included. Being able to assist such couples who have few options in creating an individualistic, meaningful ceremony has been a satisfying experience.
Q: Where do I perform wedding ceremonies?
A: Acceptable ceremony locations may be churches, chapels, gardens, lawns, private homes, plantations, ballrooms, or community halls. Please note that some churches have restrictions on whom they will allow to perform a wedding in their building. Also note that some military chapels require pre-marital counseling, which would have to be arranged with other sources.
Q: What is my availability?
A: Since I work full time, all consultations, rehearsals, and ceremonies should be held in the evenings or on weekends. Rehearsals during the day on weekdays may be arranged, if convenient for me, with two months notice, but will require compensation for lost vacation time, and may be subject to unavailability. Attendance by the Celebrant at rehearsal (an added cost item) is recommended, but not entirely necessary, especially if the ceremony is well choreographed. It will be important to schedule well in advance, as some weddings are planned as much as two years ahead.
Q: How do I dress when officiating weddings?
A: As the Celebrator, I typically wear a black suit with an understated tie. A black robe is available. Informal dress my be appropriate in certain circumstances. Special garments (tuxedo, etc.) requested by the couple, will be accommodated, if at all possible, if reimbursed. PLEASE DO NOT order a BOUTONNIERE for the Celebrant.
Q: Will you conduct a "theme" wedding?
A: If the couple wants to have their wedding party's clothing from a certain historical period (e.g., colonial, Civil War, Victorian, etc.) I will try to accommodate them. I do not conduct weddings in flippant or comedic costume. The guiding principle is that the wedding is a solemnization, not a staged show.
Q: What are my limitations?
A: Aside from a need for general dignity and solemnity befitting the occasion, there are only a couple of ceremonial items that I will consider inappropriate. Since the Commonwealth does not recognize an inequality between husband and wife and since it is my own understanding that marriage should be between equals, I will not use words that reflect a subservient or dominated status for one of the participants. I also do not perform weddings in undignified or novelty circumstances or locations.
Q: What are my qualifications?
A: I was commissioned as a Layman Celebrator of Marriage (LCM) in 1996 by the Circuit Court of Henrico County. LCM's must post a cash bond to ensure the proper performance of their duty to perform and record marriages. The court order appointing me is available for your verification. My education includes both bachelor's and master's degrees.
Q: What is a Layman Celebrator of Marriage?
A: Certain government officials are authorized to perform weddings, such as judges and magistrates. A Layman Celebrator (sometimes called a Commissioner or Civil Celebrant) is a layperson who is court-appointed to perform marriages. Weddings by a court appointed person such as myself are classified as "Civil" no matter whether religious words or sentiments are expressed.
Q: We have a family friend from another state who is a minister. Can you include him in the ceremony?
A: All ministers or religious leaders must register with a Circuit Court and present their credentials before performing weddings. If you have an out-of-state minister who does not wish to go through the Virginia registration process so he/she can perform the wedding, I will be pleased to include him or her in parts of the ceremony for readings, homilies, etc.
Q: For whom will I perform ceremonies?
A: The qualification to become married is set by State Law, and the Circuit Courts issue marriage licenses to those who meet those qualifications. If the state qualifies you to marry, I do not have any added personal restrictions on whom I will marry. There are no restrictions regarding religious affiliations, previous marriages, or other issues of life-style status that I impose on couples. Other types of non-regulated ceremonies such as child welcoming ceremonies, memorial services, engagement ceremonies, renewal of vows, and other rite-of-passage ceremonies would be considered on a case-by-case basis.
Q: What if we want a simple, private ceremony?
A: A simple, private ceremony may be held at my home or any special suitable place. No witnesses are required by The Commonwealth of Virginia. Virginia requires that a marriage be "solemnized" in the presence of a licensed Celebrant, but does not say what that is to mean. I take the meaning to be: that a couple will state in my presence that they solemnly agree to marry each other, and that I pronounce that they are indeed married. As you will see from the photos below, our living room has an old Virginia charm that will look good as a backdrop for your wedding photos. We can use your camera or provide digital images of your wedding (free) using our camera.
The Winn Home
"I just wanted to say Thank You again! The ceremony you prepared for Robert and me was perfect.... and your home was the perfect setting! I can't say thank you enough!!!"
Ginette
Q: We love nature and would like to get married outdoors in a park setting. Can you make any suggestions for locations?
A: The Richmond area is replete with parks, lakes, rivers, and similar grounds. Bryan Park is near my home and several photos of natural settings there are shown below. Special ceremony words and readings about nature are available and very suitable for outdoor settings. Please note that many parks require notification and/or payment for special uses, so be sure to check with their management.
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